


Five people Darcy tased and one she didn't

by maielalcinoe



Category: Captain America (2011), The Avengers (2012), Thor (2011)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-15
Updated: 2012-01-15
Packaged: 2017-10-29 13:42:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/320535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maielalcinoe/pseuds/maielalcinoe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Darcy and her taser, its love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five people Darcy tased and one she didn't

**Author's Note:**

> Can be read with Star Wars and Ice Cream

Title: Five people Darcy tased and one she didn't.  
Fandom: Avengers/Thor/Captain America  
Characters: Clint Barton, Darcy Lewis, mentions of Coulson, Thor, Bruce Volstagg and Cap  
Pairing: none  
Word Count: 926  
Disclaimer: Not mine, just playing  
A/N: Not betaed so all mistakes are mine. In fact anything that doesn't make sense or seems ooc is me.  
Summary: Darcy and her taser, its love.

The first person Darcy used her taser on was an annoying drunk guy who'd followed her out of a club convinced that somehow when she said no she didn't want to go home with him she really meant yes. So she had used her special friend in order to convince him that she really meant no. He'd taken the hint.

The second person Darcy tased was Thor. That was hardly her fault, he had appeared out of nowhere in the middle of the desert and he'd been acting freaky. No one could deny that. How was she supposed to know that yes he really was the son of Odin and the God of Thunder who had a magic hammer and that he had gotten there by some bridge or another. Personally she preferred calling it the bifrost, it involved less science that way.

Number three was one of Coulson's agent goons who had a habit of appearing when they were least wanted or needed. This particular one had a habit of staring at her which made her feel uncomfortable and after one long, stressful day she decided enough was enough and released the beast. It turned out he'd been looking at her because he thought she was hot and was plucking up the courage to ask her out on a date. That had earned him one she had thought although by the time it was done she was sure she'd rather have been hit by the taser herself.

Volstagg was number four but that was because he'd asked her to. Apparently Thor regaled them all with the story of her toy on their first brief meeting and Volstagg just had to try it out, just once so he could say he had. Thor in particular had found this highly amusing and had her repeat the process just so he could watch. On the other hand Steve had frowned at her until she used her big browns eyes on him and promised not to tase someone for another person's enjoyment, even if he was an alien, god person.

It was number five that caused the biggest problems, literally. In Darcy's defence she had been working and hadn't heard him approach and given the fact she'd been up too long and drunk way too much coffee she couldn't be held accountable. How was she to know when she fired the thing that she was aiming at his man parts and that would make him go all green on her.

Seeing Bruce hulk out was a first for her, at least in person. Sure she'd seen the footage on TV and in briefings and things but never actually right in front of her. Not that it was something she had on her bucket list or anything but even so she could cross it off. It had started with his eyes that was the most scary part about it. They went from being Bruce's eyes which were kind, calm, caring to ones full of absolute rage. She had staggered backwards to try and get away but there were cabinets and tables in the way. It was when she reached the wall she got really scared.

She had her eyes closed not really wanting to see the blow come, mainly because she was certain he would kill her with one swipe but it didn't arrive. Instead what she got was a blast of air, really smelly, nasty air and then she was pulled forward just a little as he inhaled. He was sniffing her! Opening one eye just a tiny bit she stole a glance at him just in time to see the huge face moving towards her, his mouth was wide open and then came the almighty roar.  
A scream escaped her before she could stop it, not that anyone would be able to hear over the noise The Hulk was making. But still the blow didn't come. There was lots of crashing and over turning of furniture but it was moving away from her. Opening both eyes she looked at the scene in front of her. "Oh my god, everyone is going to kill me." It was that point she fainted.

The next thing she knew someone was cradling her and stroking her cheek, calling her name. Her hand groped for her taser but she couldn't find it. "It's okay Darcy, you're safe." Instead of searching for the offending item she reached her arm up to touch the person who was holding her. Opening her eyes slowly she groaned, "Clint?" That certainly wasn't the face she was expecting to see. She struggled to try and stand and when she finally managed it another groan escaped her lips. Once for the wave of dizziness that enveloped her and another for the carnage of the room. "Crap."

"It was an accident," she began her words falling out of her mouth, "it's not my fault, or his. I mean I didn't know he was there and then I tased him..." Clint took hold of her firmly, "it's okay Darcy. It can all be fixed, now we need to get you checked out because you're irreplaceable."

She got a goofy smile then, "I am?" A woozy sensation passed over her again and she felt her legs turn to jelly. "Wow, that was fun." She felt herself being lifted upwards and then she was held in Clint's arms. He was surprisingly strong and he smelt great. Now she knew she wasn't feeling so great. "Maybe you're right," she muttered before she passed out again.


End file.
